Don’t know if I’ve mentioned it, but we’re gonna have a baby soon. I know, big surprise, right? What’s been surprising to me is my own reaction to this whole baby thing. Right now, like that infamous cat, the child exists in a quantum state. It is neither here, nor non-existent. But more importantly, the possibilities for Speck are endless at this moment. Or at least, my thoughts on the possibilities. At this point, Speck can still be a rock and roll star (despite neither of its parents having any noticeable musical skills).
I see small children and I wonder if that’s how my child will behave. I see teenagers and wonder if that’s how my child will behave. Will Speck be a good kid who engages in mischief or a bad kid with glimmers of hope. Will they learn from example or from what we tell them?
Thing is, I have to think about these things now. Not because it will change anything, but because now is the only time I have when Speck is entirely theoretical. In 10 weeks or so, this little creature is going to come into the world and at that point, all bets are off. Oh sure, we as parents still have a whole lot of work to do (and I know only that I don’t know), but our work is tempered by the fact that our little one will have opinions and ideas of their very own. I look at my Etsy wish list for Speck and it’s filled with the kind of geek stuff I love and will certainly use… Until Speck is old enough to decide on its own. And, I’m assured, this time will come much sooner than I’m expecting.
So what’s a soon to be dad to do? I’m channeling old Robin Williams routines (“There’s a part of you imagining your child up there, accepting the Nobel prize, and another part imagining them saying ‘you want fries with that?'”) and then making lists of the things I want to share and hoping the little one will enjoy at least some of my interests. Because until that head pops out, the possibilities are endless. And when it does, it’s my job to make sure they think the possibilities are endless for as long as I can.
And really, what it ultimately comes down to, is I just want to meet this little person and spend the rest of my life getting to know them.
11 thoughts on “Schrödingers Child”
And oh just wait until they start talking, and won’t stop. There’s a sweet spot with kids, from say, when they start walking until just after they start forming sentences where they’re the cutest thing in the world. But then…oh they become monsters. These little horrible creatures who don’t know right from wrong and will drive you crazy and turn your remaining hair gray. That’s not to say you stop loving them, and that they can’t surprise you with new and different things. For example, my daughter just introduced me to Steven Universe a couple weeks ago and I love it.
But yeah, they grow on you, kind of like mold.
Looking forward to every minute of it 🙂
Oh and dealing with school…ugh. Dealing with school is quite actually the worst.
Yeah… gonna be interesting doing that overseas as well. Gonna be interesting too see where we are in 5 years.
I love your Etsy wish list!
Hey Jaq – It’s a frightening time, I know, but I still can’t help but be jealous that you have such a universe of possibilities in front of you. 🙂
Don’t waste too much time thinking about ‘our parents, they f*ck us up’ because once one starts wallowing in that particular mud splat, one forgets that humans have been raising pretty-A-OK kids for tens of thousands of years. Don’t leave Speck to be baby-sat by sabre-toothed tigers, wrap Speck up warm in cold weather, and breeeeaathe—reeeelaaax.
Oh, and smile a lot, even when the sleep deprivation gives you really bad mental images of the pain you could happily inflict on everyone in your path.
I’m really looking forward to more missives about this 10-week countdown – and of course, the big wedding event! Good luck this weekend to both of you, and I hope you have a wonderfully happy day.
Thank you! And yeah, I’m not worrying too much about that, these were just thoughts floating around my head.
Video of the affair will hopefully be up by early in the week, keep an eye on this space.
The Etsy list looks like Speck is a convenient excuse to buy cool stuff.
Most etsy lists are 🙂
The more practical list is on Amazon and it will be coming shortly. Although I really want a superhero diaper bag!